They slip that propaganda in wherever they can these days...
So, Don Aslett, cleaning mogul, is apparently intending to open a massive "MUSEUM OF CLEAN!" in Pocatello sometime in the near future. I came across this story in the Twin Falls rag, "The Times News". The article began as follows:"If cleanliness is next to godliness, Don Aslett's new museum might be the next best thing to a cathedral.
Aslett, who parlayed his penchant for cleanliness into an international janitorial business, plans to open Don Aslett's Cleaning Museum in the fall of 2008 in this southeastern Idaho city.
"I've sold clean as a culture," Aslett told the Idaho State Journal. "When you hear Pocatello, you're going to think clean."
Alright, that sounds just fine. Not the type of museum that I could really give a crap about, but anything being built in Pocatello is probably a good thing, since that town is a dying shithole. I'd have likely passed over this article without any comments or additional thoughts, but then I saw the next line of type!
"The history of clean at the museum begins with a giant model of Noah's Ark, a reference to the worldwide cleaning of Biblical proportions."
Ok now, why is it that any time that something of a "historical" nature is constructed in Idaho, they have to slip in some ridiculous biblical garbage, putting a very nasty taint on the authenticity of the exhibit???
Is Don Aslett really that dumb? You have to be a complete moron to actually believe that there was a Noah, let alone that he built an ark which protected two of each land dwelling species for 40 days while God wiped out every man, woman, child, unborn child, and every other land dwelling life form on the planet because the good ole' Lord was pissed off.
Maybe he's intending it to be symbolic for something like "THE ULTIMATE CLEANSING" or something like that, but couldn't he find something based in fact to emphasize his joy for cleaning? What kind of museum would include an exhibit based entirely in myth, and present it to children as part of an educational exhibit? And, if you're using the tale of Noah to emphasize that "CLEANING IS GOOD", does that not on a level state to children that "GENOCIDE IS A GOOD THING!"??? And this is, from the way the article described it, the first thing people will encounter in the museum!!!
Hey Don, take your Christian propaganda, and stick it up your ass with one of those special gloves you sell for outrageous prices at your cleaning supply store. Ram it up there really good with one of your static electricity brooms as well.
Rating:3.00
Comments
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1
fuck yeah!
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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2
Historical accuracy aside, can you imagine how UN-clean the Ark would have been after 40 days with all those animals on board? I always used to ponder that as a kid. And how about this: If God created dirt, then isn't cleaning kind of sacrilegious?
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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3
Can anyone imagine worshiping a god that completely wiped out every living thing on the planet with a flood and only spared the few people and animals that managed to make it onto the Ark? Surely every man, woman and child on the planet wasn't evil but he killed them anyway because he got "angry". WTF?
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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4
To the poster of this vent:
Who cares?
I REALLY don't. I don't even know who that guy is.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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5
what the fuck are you talking about
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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6
"Who cares? I REALLY don't. I don't even know who that guy is."
And because you don't care that means no one else does? Just because you don't keep up with current events doesn't mean we're all clueless.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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7
Oh yeah, current events my ass! I didn't see that on CNN. They must be wasting their time on actual news. I'm sorry you are so offended by the Noah's ark tale. Seriously get a life, or go join an anti religion group like the rest of the miserable motherfuckers out there.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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8
Oh no! A CLEANING museum with a bible message!! Propaganda!! Those damn religious people are trying to instill christianity in our kids again!!! AAAAHHH! If you don't like it, don't go there.
PS: I think anyone with common sense does not believe in the least bit that the Noahs ark tale is true, religious or not. Even people who dedicate their life to bible study don't believe that crap. It was put there to convey a message, kind of like a fable. I'd be willing to bet that 8/10 chrisitans don't believe half of the stories in the bible.
The point of the story is to have faith and believe that if you do the right thing you will be ok. All of you people that think all christians are radicals need to wake up and come up with YOUR OWN conclusions, not follow everyone else. The christians that I know will tell you that the bible was written by man, to ensure that there are guidelines as to how to behave, and make a book of basic morals to keep people decent. Just as in all religions, the main themes are: don't lie, steal, kill, give to the poor, help others, etc.
Most of you people think that everyone who follows religion is a buffoon and a believer in fairy tales. Grow up! Not everyone who wants to live a clean life is a fool.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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9
^ I'll go you one further and bet that 8/10 Christians have never READ half the stories in the Bible. But I agree with your last paragraph and add that religion is more what you DO as a human than it is what you profess to believe.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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10
Everybody who lives in Pocatello sucks dick for a living.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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11
"Everybody who lives in Pocatello sucks dick for a living."
You've gotten a blowjob from everyone in Pocatello? Impressive. Either that or it's a really small town.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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12
You poor fools only one religion is right, You must embrace his noodly appendages! Pastaforians we must spread the word of The Flying Spaghetti Monster.
" If ye only have faith, in him ye shall be rewarded with volcanoes of beer and stripper factories in HEAVEN! "
Ragu 14:9
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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13
Wow, above me, I guess your God is mass media? Addicted to consumerism, are we? That's what happens when your best ideas come from a popular animated show (south park) Why don't you think of your own ideas? You are obviously someone's slave, so stop hating.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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14
^^^
To the dumbass wanna be, here is the history of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search
"Bobby Henderson" redirects here. For other uses, see Bobby Henderson (disambiguation).
Niklas Jansson's adaptation of Michelangelo's The Creation of Adam depicts the Flying Spaghetti Monster in its typical guise as a clump of tangled spaghetti with two eyestalks, two meatballs, and many "noodly appendages".The Flying Spaghetti Monster (also known as the Spaghedeity) is the deity of a parody religion[1][2][3] called The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and its system of beliefs, "Pastafarianism".[1] The religion was founded in 2005 by Oregon State University physics graduate Bobby Henderson to protest the decision by the Kansas State Board of Education to require the teaching of intelligent design as an alternative to biological evolution.
In an open letter sent to the education board, Henderson professes belief in a supernatural creator called the Flying Spaghetti Monster which resembles spaghetti and meatballs.[4] He furthermore calls for the "Pastafarian" theory of creation to be taught in science classrooms.[5]
Due to its recent popularity and media exposure, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is used by atheists, agnostics (known by Pastafarians as "spagnostics"), and others as a modern version of Russell's teapot.[
The first public exposure of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (CoFSM) and its eponymous deity can be dated to January 2005, when Bobby Henderson sent an open letter regarding the FSM to the Kansas Board of Education. The letter was sent prior to the Kansas evolution hearings as an argument against the teaching of intelligent design in biology classes. Henderson stated that both his theory and intelligent design had equal validity; saying
"I think we can all look forward to the time when these three theories are given equal time in our science classrooms across the country, and eventually the world; One third time for Intelligent Design, one third time for Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, and one third time for logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence."[4]
Henderson explained, "I don't have a problem with religion. What I have a problem with is religion posing as science. If there is a god and he's intelligent, then I would guess he has a sense of humor."[7]
The Board only responded after Henderson posted the letter on his website, gaining significant public interest.[8] Henderson subsequently published the responses[9] he received from board members. On February 13, 2007, the Board voted 6 to 4 to reject the amended science standards enacted in 2005.
As word of Henderson's challenge to the board spread, the website and Henderson's cause gathered more attention and support. The satiric nature of Henderson's argument made the Flying Spaghetti Monster popular with bloggers as well as humor and internet culture websites.[10] The site was featured on websites such as Boing Boing, Something Awful, Uncyclopedia and Fark.com. The mainstream media quickly picked up on the phenomenon as the Flying Spaghetti Monster became a symbol for the case against intelligent design theory in public education.[11][12][13] Henderson himself is surprised by its success, stating that he "wrote the letter for [his] own amusement as much as anything."[2]
In August 2005, in response to a challenge from a reader, BoingBoing.net announced a $250,000 challenge, later raised to $1,000,000, of "Intelligently Designed currency" by other bloggers, payable to any individual who could produce empirical evidence proving that Jesus is not the son of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, though Jesus is not a part of Pastafarianism.[14] The challenge is modelled after a similar challenge issued by young-Earth creationist Kent Hovind (an award of $250,000 to anyone who can prove evolution "is the only possible way" that the Universe and life arose).
In November 2007, three talks involving the Flying Spaghetti Monster are scheduled to be delivered at the American Academy of Religion's annual meeting in San Diego. The talks include titles such as, "Holy Pasta and Authentic Sauce: The Flying Spaghetti Monster's Messy Implications for Theorizing Religion".[15] Academics say while its inclusion in the program may get laughs it is a serious debate on the essence of religion exploring questions such as "does religion require a genuine theological belief or simply a set of rituals and a community joining together as a way of signaling their cultural alliances to others?" or in short, "is an anti-religion like Flying Spaghetti Monsterism actually a religion?"[16]
[edit] Beliefs
A Pastafarian depiction of the creation of the universe sent in an open letter to the Kansas School Board.Henderson proposed many of the beliefs in reaction to common arguments by proponents of intelligent design.[17]
The canonical beliefs of Flying Spaghetti Monsterism are set forth by Henderson in the Open Letter,[4] the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and on Henderson's web site,[18] where he is described as a prophet.
The central belief is that there is an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster, which created the entire universe "after drinking heavily."[2] All evidence for evolution was planted by the Flying Spaghetti Monster, in an effort to test Pastafarians' faith; a form of the Omphalos hypothesis. When scientific measurements, such as radiocarbon dating, are made, the Flying Spaghetti Monster "is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage."[4]
The Pastafarian belief of heaven stresses that it contains beer volcanoes and a stripper factory.[19] Hell is similar, except that the beer is stale and the strippers have VD.[20]
The religious text of the Pastafarian religion is called the Loose Canon. In place of the Ten Commandments, it contains the Eight I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts.
The official conclusion to prayers is "RAmen", contained in certain sections of The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and so on. It is a portmanteau of the Semitic term "Amen" (used in Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) and Ramen, a noodle. While it is typically spelled with both a capital "R" and "A", it is also acceptable to spell it with only a capital R.
[edit] Pirates and global warming
Chart comparing Number of Pirates versus Global Warming. The labels on the x-axis are deliberately misleading.According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates are "absolute divine beings" and the original Pastafarians.[4] Their image as "thieves and outcasts" is misinformation spread by Christian theologians in the Middle Ages and Hare Krishnas. Pastafarianism says that they were in fact "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will" who distributed candy to small children, and adds that modern pirates are in no way similar to "the fun-loving buccaneers from history." Pastafarians celebrate International Talk Like a Pirate Day on the September 19.
The inclusion of pirates in Pastafarianism was part of Henderson's original letter to the Kansas School Board. It illustrated that Correlation does not imply causation. Henderson put forth the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s."[4] A chart accompanying the letter shows that as the number of pirates decreased, global temperatures increased; the absurdity of this demonstrates how statistically significant correlations do not imply a causal relationship (see confounding).
[edit] The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
The Gospel of The Flying Spaghetti MonsterMain article: The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
In December 2005, Bobby Henderson received a reported USD $80,000 advance to pen The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Henderson said he plans to use the proceeds from the sale of the book to build a pirate ship, with which he may travel the world in order to convert heathens to the Pastafarian religion.[21] The book was released on March 28, 2006 (ISBN 0-8129-7656-8).
The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is the Pastafarian equivalent of the Bible. It parodies biblical figures with characters such as Captain Mosey, a pirate and the FSM equivalent of Moses. The Gospel contains the aforementioned Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts." It also provides information on how to convert non-"Pastafarians" and explains many of the religion's beliefs (for example, that lack of pirates causes global warming).
So as you can see South Park did not create this parody religion, so please do some research before you spout off some ill typed rant about consumerism.
And if you are to dense to realize that the post above you is being extremely sarcastic, maybe you should put the keyboard down and leave intellectual/sarcastic discussions to the adults.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
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15
Oh right because wikipedia is research.
I guess that makes you an intelllectual individual.
Ok, you proved me wrong, wikiman. Of course there wasn't any actual research done, so you can't take credit for any of it.
By the way, I never picked up the keyboard in the first place, it's sitting on my desk.
Oregon State University needs better professors.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
1
fuck yeah!Posted 11 months ago | Report
2
Historical accuracy aside, can you imagine how UN-clean the Ark would have been after 40 days with all those animals on board? I always used to ponder that as a kid. And how about this: If God created dirt, then isn't cleaning kind of sacrilegious? Posted 11 months ago | Report
3
Can anyone imagine worshiping a god that completely wiped out every living thing on the planet with a flood and only spared the few people and animals that managed to make it onto the Ark? Surely every man, woman and child on the planet wasn't evil but he killed them anyway because he got "angry". WTF?Posted 11 months ago | Report
4
To the poster of this vent:Who cares?
I REALLY don't. I don't even know who that guy is.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
5
what the fuck are you talking aboutPosted 11 months ago | Report
6
"Who cares? I REALLY don't. I don't even know who that guy is."And because you don't care that means no one else does? Just because you don't keep up with current events doesn't mean we're all clueless.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
7
Oh yeah, current events my ass! I didn't see that on CNN. They must be wasting their time on actual news. I'm sorry you are so offended by the Noah's ark tale. Seriously get a life, or go join an anti religion group like the rest of the miserable motherfuckers out there.Posted 11 months ago | Report
8
Oh no! A CLEANING museum with a bible message!! Propaganda!! Those damn religious people are trying to instill christianity in our kids again!!! AAAAHHH! If you don't like it, don't go there. PS: I think anyone with common sense does not believe in the least bit that the Noahs ark tale is true, religious or not. Even people who dedicate their life to bible study don't believe that crap. It was put there to convey a message, kind of like a fable. I'd be willing to bet that 8/10 chrisitans don't believe half of the stories in the bible.
The point of the story is to have faith and believe that if you do the right thing you will be ok. All of you people that think all christians are radicals need to wake up and come up with YOUR OWN conclusions, not follow everyone else. The christians that I know will tell you that the bible was written by man, to ensure that there are guidelines as to how to behave, and make a book of basic morals to keep people decent. Just as in all religions, the main themes are: don't lie, steal, kill, give to the poor, help others, etc.
Most of you people think that everyone who follows religion is a buffoon and a believer in fairy tales. Grow up! Not everyone who wants to live a clean life is a fool.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
9
^ I'll go you one further and bet that 8/10 Christians have never READ half the stories in the Bible. But I agree with your last paragraph and add that religion is more what you DO as a human than it is what you profess to believe.Posted 11 months ago | Report
10
Everybody who lives in Pocatello sucks dick for a living. Posted 11 months ago | Report
11
"Everybody who lives in Pocatello sucks dick for a living."You've gotten a blowjob from everyone in Pocatello? Impressive. Either that or it's a really small town.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
12
You poor fools only one religion is right, You must embrace his noodly appendages! Pastaforians we must spread the word of The Flying Spaghetti Monster." If ye only have faith, in him ye shall be rewarded with volcanoes of beer and stripper factories in HEAVEN! "
Ragu 14:9
Posted 11 months ago | Report
13
Wow, above me, I guess your God is mass media? Addicted to consumerism, are we? That's what happens when your best ideas come from a popular animated show (south park) Why don't you think of your own ideas? You are obviously someone's slave, so stop hating.Posted 11 months ago | Report
14
^^^To the dumbass wanna be, here is the history of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search
"Bobby Henderson" redirects here. For other uses, see Bobby Henderson (disambiguation).
Niklas Jansson's adaptation of Michelangelo's The Creation of Adam depicts the Flying Spaghetti Monster in its typical guise as a clump of tangled spaghetti with two eyestalks, two meatballs, and many "noodly appendages".The Flying Spaghetti Monster (also known as the Spaghedeity) is the deity of a parody religion[1][2][3] called The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and its system of beliefs, "Pastafarianism".[1] The religion was founded in 2005 by Oregon State University physics graduate Bobby Henderson to protest the decision by the Kansas State Board of Education to require the teaching of intelligent design as an alternative to biological evolution.
In an open letter sent to the education board, Henderson professes belief in a supernatural creator called the Flying Spaghetti Monster which resembles spaghetti and meatballs.[4] He furthermore calls for the "Pastafarian" theory of creation to be taught in science classrooms.[5]
Due to its recent popularity and media exposure, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is used by atheists, agnostics (known by Pastafarians as "spagnostics"), and others as a modern version of Russell's teapot.[
The first public exposure of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (CoFSM) and its eponymous deity can be dated to January 2005, when Bobby Henderson sent an open letter regarding the FSM to the Kansas Board of Education. The letter was sent prior to the Kansas evolution hearings as an argument against the teaching of intelligent design in biology classes. Henderson stated that both his theory and intelligent design had equal validity; saying
"I think we can all look forward to the time when these three theories are given equal time in our science classrooms across the country, and eventually the world; One third time for Intelligent Design, one third time for Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, and one third time for logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence."[4]
Henderson explained, "I don't have a problem with religion. What I have a problem with is religion posing as science. If there is a god and he's intelligent, then I would guess he has a sense of humor."[7]
The Board only responded after Henderson posted the letter on his website, gaining significant public interest.[8] Henderson subsequently published the responses[9] he received from board members. On February 13, 2007, the Board voted 6 to 4 to reject the amended science standards enacted in 2005.
As word of Henderson's challenge to the board spread, the website and Henderson's cause gathered more attention and support. The satiric nature of Henderson's argument made the Flying Spaghetti Monster popular with bloggers as well as humor and internet culture websites.[10] The site was featured on websites such as Boing Boing, Something Awful, Uncyclopedia and Fark.com. The mainstream media quickly picked up on the phenomenon as the Flying Spaghetti Monster became a symbol for the case against intelligent design theory in public education.[11][12][13] Henderson himself is surprised by its success, stating that he "wrote the letter for [his] own amusement as much as anything."[2]
In August 2005, in response to a challenge from a reader, BoingBoing.net announced a $250,000 challenge, later raised to $1,000,000, of "Intelligently Designed currency" by other bloggers, payable to any individual who could produce empirical evidence proving that Jesus is not the son of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, though Jesus is not a part of Pastafarianism.[14] The challenge is modelled after a similar challenge issued by young-Earth creationist Kent Hovind (an award of $250,000 to anyone who can prove evolution "is the only possible way" that the Universe and life arose).
In November 2007, three talks involving the Flying Spaghetti Monster are scheduled to be delivered at the American Academy of Religion's annual meeting in San Diego. The talks include titles such as, "Holy Pasta and Authentic Sauce: The Flying Spaghetti Monster's Messy Implications for Theorizing Religion".[15] Academics say while its inclusion in the program may get laughs it is a serious debate on the essence of religion exploring questions such as "does religion require a genuine theological belief or simply a set of rituals and a community joining together as a way of signaling their cultural alliances to others?" or in short, "is an anti-religion like Flying Spaghetti Monsterism actually a religion?"[16]
[edit] Beliefs
A Pastafarian depiction of the creation of the universe sent in an open letter to the Kansas School Board.Henderson proposed many of the beliefs in reaction to common arguments by proponents of intelligent design.[17]
The canonical beliefs of Flying Spaghetti Monsterism are set forth by Henderson in the Open Letter,[4] the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and on Henderson's web site,[18] where he is described as a prophet.
The central belief is that there is an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster, which created the entire universe "after drinking heavily."[2] All evidence for evolution was planted by the Flying Spaghetti Monster, in an effort to test Pastafarians' faith; a form of the Omphalos hypothesis. When scientific measurements, such as radiocarbon dating, are made, the Flying Spaghetti Monster "is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage."[4]
The Pastafarian belief of heaven stresses that it contains beer volcanoes and a stripper factory.[19] Hell is similar, except that the beer is stale and the strippers have VD.[20]
The religious text of the Pastafarian religion is called the Loose Canon. In place of the Ten Commandments, it contains the Eight I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts.
The official conclusion to prayers is "RAmen", contained in certain sections of The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and so on. It is a portmanteau of the Semitic term "Amen" (used in Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) and Ramen, a noodle. While it is typically spelled with both a capital "R" and "A", it is also acceptable to spell it with only a capital R.
[edit] Pirates and global warming
Chart comparing Number of Pirates versus Global Warming. The labels on the x-axis are deliberately misleading.According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates are "absolute divine beings" and the original Pastafarians.[4] Their image as "thieves and outcasts" is misinformation spread by Christian theologians in the Middle Ages and Hare Krishnas. Pastafarianism says that they were in fact "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will" who distributed candy to small children, and adds that modern pirates are in no way similar to "the fun-loving buccaneers from history." Pastafarians celebrate International Talk Like a Pirate Day on the September 19.
The inclusion of pirates in Pastafarianism was part of Henderson's original letter to the Kansas School Board. It illustrated that Correlation does not imply causation. Henderson put forth the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s."[4] A chart accompanying the letter shows that as the number of pirates decreased, global temperatures increased; the absurdity of this demonstrates how statistically significant correlations do not imply a causal relationship (see confounding).
[edit] The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
The Gospel of The Flying Spaghetti MonsterMain article: The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
In December 2005, Bobby Henderson received a reported USD $80,000 advance to pen The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Henderson said he plans to use the proceeds from the sale of the book to build a pirate ship, with which he may travel the world in order to convert heathens to the Pastafarian religion.[21] The book was released on March 28, 2006 (ISBN 0-8129-7656-8).
The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is the Pastafarian equivalent of the Bible. It parodies biblical figures with characters such as Captain Mosey, a pirate and the FSM equivalent of Moses. The Gospel contains the aforementioned Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts." It also provides information on how to convert non-"Pastafarians" and explains many of the religion's beliefs (for example, that lack of pirates causes global warming).
So as you can see South Park did not create this parody religion, so please do some research before you spout off some ill typed rant about consumerism.
And if you are to dense to realize that the post above you is being extremely sarcastic, maybe you should put the keyboard down and leave intellectual/sarcastic discussions to the adults.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
15
Oh right because wikipedia is research.I guess that makes you an intelllectual individual.
Ok, you proved me wrong, wikiman. Of course there wasn't any actual research done, so you can't take credit for any of it.
By the way, I never picked up the keyboard in the first place, it's sitting on my desk.
Oregon State University needs better professors.
Posted 11 months ago | Report
